Gold:
I used to think I was smarter than everybody. Then I put aftershave on my balls...for the second time. Adam Vincent, Humans Anonymous
"The Herald-Sun’s Andrew Bolt" is a complete anagram of the words "bland lout answers the herd".
Luke Whitby, Was it a Cat I Saw?
Now that John Howard is gone, I just don’t know what not to believe any more.
Courteney Hocking, Mixing Pop and Politics
Meh:
My granddad was responsible for shooting down two German planes. Unfortunately, he did it in 1971. But he said you could never be too careful.
John Moloney, Only Moloney
What’s the best thing about being a gargoyle? You’re always high.
Edan Lacey and Nick O’Donnell, Eine Kleine Story Time