3.3.09

Some nice wordplay

This is a few years old but it is still pretty clever.

The Washington Post's Style Invitational once again asked readers to
take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or
changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this year's
winners:


1. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that
stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately,
shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

2. Foreploy (v): Any misrepresentation about yourself for the
purpose of getting laid.

3. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders
the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

4. Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

5. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit
and the person who doesn't get it.

6. Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are
running late.

7. Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness.

8. Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease. (This one got
extra credit.)

9. Karmageddon (n): It's like, when everybody is sending off
all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes
and it's like, a serious bummer.

10. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the
day consuming only things that are good for you.

11. Glibido (v): All talk and no action.

12 Dopeler effect (n): The tendency of stupid ideas to seem
smarter when they come at you rapidly.

13. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just
after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

14. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets
into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

15. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a
grub in the fruit you're eating.


And the pick of the literature:

16. Ignoranus (n): A person who's both stupid and an asshole.